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Author Topic: 23 beliefs to eliminate for natural confidence  (Read 3736 times)

pcguy730

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23 beliefs to eliminate for natural confidence
« on: August 08, 2017, 03:01:01 AM »
Hello,

 Here is 23 beliefs that stop natural confidence according to the Lefkoe Method. I was never able to actually do the exercises and get any benefit but I think with the belief blaster I can finally make some changes. I am sharing them here incase anyone else wants to go through the list. I will put my best guess for past tense if anyone has a better suggestion please share.

Mistakes and failure are bad. ---- Mistakes and failure has been bad..

I'm not good enough. ---- I haven't been good enough..

Change is difficult. ---- Change has been difficult..

I'm not important.  ---- I haven't been important..

What makes me good enough or important is having people think well of me. ---- Maybe break this one up too complex?

Nothing I do is good enough. ---- Nothing I've done was good enough..

I'm not capable. ---- I haven't been capable..

I'm not competent. ---- I haven't been competent..

I'm inadequate. ---- I've been inadequate..

If I make a mistake or fail I'll be rejected. ---- Mistakes and failure has caused me rejection..? Complex, break it up?

I'm a failure.  ---- I've been a failure..

I'm stupid.  ---- I've been stupid..

I'm not worthy.  ---- I haven't been worthy..

I'll never get what I want. ---- I haven't got what I want..

I'm powerless.  ---- I've been powerless..

People aren't interested in what I have to say. ---- People haven't been interested in what I have to say..

What I have to say isn't important. ---- What I have to say haven't been important..

It's dangerous to have people put their attention on me (something bad will happen). ---- It has been dangerous to have people put their attention on me..

What makes me good enough or important is doing things perfectly. ---- Doing things perfectly has been what made me good enough or important..

Brian

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Re: 23 beliefs to eliminate for natural confidence
« Reply #1 on: August 08, 2017, 07:54:41 AM »
Hello,

 Here is 23 beliefs that stop natural confidence according to the Lefkoe Method. I was never able to actually do the exercises and get any benefit but I think with the belief blaster I can finally make some changes. I am sharing them here incase anyone else wants to go through the list. I will put my best guess for past tense if anyone has a better suggestion please share.

Mistakes and failure are bad. ---- Mistakes and failure has been bad..

I'm not good enough. ---- I haven't been good enough..

Change is difficult. ---- Change has been difficult..

I'm not important.  ---- I haven't been important..

Nothing I do is good enough. ---- Nothing I've done was good enough

I'm not capable. ---- I haven't been capable..

I'm not competent. ---- I haven't been competent..

I'm inadequate. ---- I've been inadequate..

If I make a mistake or fail I'll be rejected. ---- Mistakes and failure has caused me rejection..? Complex, break it up?

I'm a failure.  ---- I've been a failure..

I'm stupid.  ---- I've been stupid..

I'm not worthy.  ---- I haven't been worthy..

I'll never get what I want. ---- I haven't got what I want..

I'm powerless.  ---- I've been powerless..

People aren't interested in what I have to say. ---- People haven't been interested in what I have to say..

What I have to say isn't important. ---- What I have to say haven't been important..

It's dangerous to have people put their attention on me (something bad will happen). ---- It has been dangerous to have people put their attention on me..

What makes me good enough or important is doing things perfectly. ---- Doing things perfectly has been what made me good enough or important..
Mistakes and failure are bad. ---- Mistakes and failure HAD been bad.. and it might be better to do this in a few separate beliefs - making mistakes was bad. I've been a failure, failing was bad or has been bad
Other variations that may work better.

It hasn't been ok to make mistakes or making mistakes has been bad
It hasn't been ok to fail or failure has been bad


I had been rejected for making mistakes
I had been rejected for failing
I had been embarrassed for making mistakes
I had  been embarrassed for failing.

Nothing I do has been good enough ---> nothing had been good enough

These are two anyone should clear right out of the gate. I didn't believe I had a fear of change but a few things came up and most were tied to all of the times I moved in my life and a few things at work.
Change had been hard or change was hard
Change had been bad or change was bad

What makes me good enough or important is having people think well of me. ---- Maybe break this one up too complex? Could be as simple as:

I had needed approval from others
I had needed validation from others
I had needed others to think well of me
I had needed others to respect me
(You don't need any of these things!)
There are also other ways you can word these using I was or I've been... Try a few variations and let us know your results.

I hadn't been respected and I had been disrespected.

I couldn't get what I wanted

The key as the other guys here will tell you is to say the belief out loud a few times. If it has any negative emotional charge at all and/or you have even thought or said something like this then it's best to clear it. Compare it with "I'm 8 feet tall and/or I'm a Martian" which have no charge.

Also the beliefs you have a general beliefs and that's ok. The key is if you think about them what comes to mind and do you have a charge on it.


« Last Edit: June 18, 2019, 08:20:15 AM by Brian »
If you think it, feel it or say it...PSTEC it!
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wendyowen

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Re: 23 beliefs to eliminate for natural confidence
« Reply #2 on: August 08, 2017, 05:07:34 PM »
This is wonderful stuff! I've come across to PSTEC from EFT. I'm not knocking EFT in any way, it can be very helpful. However it can take a long time to shift a limiting belief using EFT, especially if the belief is complex or long standing. I grew up in a boarding school, so have a few of these. Now I can see a way forward!
Wendy

Bloodfish

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Re: 23 beliefs to eliminate for natural confidence
« Reply #3 on: August 09, 2017, 10:25:42 AM »
I can attest to how good the lefkoe method is as I also did the natural confidence course with amazing results. The belief busters are simply the icing on the cake.

Also have a look at the following page for ideas for beliefs you may have - if any resonates with you you probably have that belief in some description.

http://www.growingaware.com/Negative_beliefs_examples.htm

Thanks for the reminder x

ponick

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Re: 23 beliefs to eliminate for natural confidence
« Reply #4 on: June 18, 2019, 08:11:27 AM »
Although this topic has not received posts for a long time, I want to contribute an update to the page of negative beliefs Bloodfish provided. It was moved from its previous location, and when I found out it was created by John Nutting, I knew it was worth tracking down:

http://www.core-beliefs-balance.com/example_negative_core_beliefs.htm

He believes that negative core beliefs cannot be totally eliminated, but rather can be balanced: http://www.core-beliefs-balance.com/understanding_belief_patterns.htm. This approach appears to be different from that used by PSTEC.

Whether one agrees with his mode of therapy or not, however, Nutting's understanding of how negative core beliefs are formed is kind and wise. I learned from him how to discover mine, and to stop scolding myself as they reveal themselves one by one.

Even though old core beliefs may be completely and totally useless and devastating ad destructive to us now, once upon a time they were logical responses to an illogical world. Back then, taking them on helped ensure that we survived childhood. Removing them now means shedding our old rusty armor and revealing new strength (and fun!) we didn't know we are capable of.



Brian

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Re: 23 beliefs to eliminate for natural confidence
« Reply #5 on: June 18, 2019, 08:22:05 AM »
He believes that negative core beliefs cannot be totally eliminated, but rather can be balanced:

I've ready his books. They are a great source of info and have helped me spot several blind spots though he should eliminate that belief. It's untrue. :)
If you think it, feel it or say it...PSTEC it!
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ponick

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Re: 23 beliefs to eliminate for natural confidence
« Reply #6 on: June 19, 2019, 02:25:22 PM »
Me, too!
Thanks for responding.
Fran

Paul

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Re: 23 beliefs to eliminate for natural confidence
« Reply #7 on: June 20, 2019, 04:39:54 AM »
Hi Fran,

Thanks for sharing those resources.

I think the author has some very interesting things to say and offers a good model. However, it is just a model. All models need to be tested and, in a bizarre way, the belief "you can't eliminate a negative belief" helps create the model. If you believe it, you'll see and experience it.

I encourage you to test out the model that you CAN eliminate a negative core belief.

To a certain degree, beliefs always make sense at the time they are formed, and when we excavate them (e.g. find them and bring them to conscious awareness), we apply the labels "positive" and "negative." The intent was always to keep us safe. That is a side issue, mind you.

I once had a virus on my PC and it took me a while to find it. I just sensed that something wasn't right. I then researched what the virus was called, what it did and how to delete it. I used 5 anti-virus software programs. The virus remained. The 6th program got rid of it completely. It would have been reasonable for me to conclude beforehand "this virus cannot be removed", but it was not true. I just needed to use the best technology for the job and to persist  ;)

I am not sure what techniques, strategies or technologies the author used to eliminate beliefs. However, I do know that even beliefs people have held for most of their lives can be cleared...and will remain cleared.

You can then layer in better suggestions for your life.

Hope that helps, Fran.

Kind Regards,

Paul
Paul McCabe - PSTEC Master Practitioner
http://www.lifestyleforchange.com

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Brian

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Re: 23 beliefs to eliminate for natural confidence
« Reply #8 on: June 20, 2019, 08:23:52 AM »
EXCELLENT understanding, Paul. This post should be a sticky in the forum. Thank you!
If you think it, feel it or say it...PSTEC it!
Book a session: https://goo.gl/2VxCUa
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ponick

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Re: 23 beliefs to eliminate for natural confidence
« Reply #9 on: June 20, 2019, 12:40:32 PM »
Hi, Paul and Brian,

I agree with Brian! Loved Paul's reference—searching for programs to get rid of his computer virus and the value of believing it was possible to get rid of it—which kept him on the search until he succeeded.

I'd like to tell you how I began searching for ways to replace (rather than accommodate) my negative core beliefs, My mother experienced a lifetime of mental illness and, when nothing else helped, even voluntarily underwent electroshock therapy in the early 1970s. After she died in 2008, my dad lived for another year. Although he was 95, he stayed completely lucid until the end. During that year, he asked me some pretty interesting questions. One time he asked me, "Your mother came to believe that maybe some people can't change no matter how hard they try and no matter what they do. Do you think that's true?"

You know, guys, that took me aback. Despite all my own therapies, I didn't like who I felt I had been obliged to become, so I couldn't possibly agree! Dad got a pretty animated response: "No!" I said. "That's not true! People can change. Of course they can!"

I didn't have a clue how that could happen, and thank goodness he didn't pursue the subject. But I've explored it since August 2009. That included learning the term "core beliefs" and even corresponding with John Nutting. (He's a great guy, but after studying his approach I regretfully concluded it wouldn't work for me.) I also explored and used EFT, EMDR, and related therapies, with varying effects. True, they are faster than conventional therapies.

But it seems to me that that for these newer therapies to work at a core-belief level, a person needs to be able to hold patience, acceptance, and hope inside longer and more consistently than many patients are able to. Meditation teaches these things, but it's still hard to persevere. Perhaps I got a gift from my difficult, difficult mother, who believed that even if she couldn't change maybe change was still possible for others: Never Give Up!

The changes I experienced in just two sessions of PSTEC were faster than what I have experienced with EFT and EMDR. Each modality has its place, of course. For me, the challenge with PSTEC is figuring out what to do after exploring the free download, and I inquired about that in another post. So many choices!

Best regards,

Fran

Brian

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Re: 23 beliefs to eliminate for natural confidence
« Reply #10 on: June 20, 2019, 01:16:20 PM »
Never Give Up!



I used to think this but I changed it to KEEP GOING!
If you think it, feel it or say it...PSTEC it!
Book a session: https://goo.gl/2VxCUa
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ponick

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Re: 23 beliefs to eliminate for natural confidence
« Reply #11 on: June 20, 2019, 08:37:16 PM »
I use "Never Give Up" b/c of Winston Churchill. Except when I checked on it to give you more info, I found I had it wrong! Here's what he actually said:
 
Quote
"... never give in, never give in, never, never, never, never - in nothing, great or small, large or petty - never give in except to convictions of honour and good sense. Never yield to force; never yield to the apparently overwhelming might of the enemy."  Oct. 29, 1941

Oh well. Never give in? Never give up? Keep going?
Whatever works!

Have a great evening!
F
« Last Edit: June 20, 2019, 08:40:23 PM by ponick »

Shane

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Re: 23 beliefs to eliminate for natural confidence
« Reply #12 on: October 05, 2019, 04:53:08 AM »
What about the belief “I’m not safe” would that still become “I wasn’t safe” because if you have been through trauma, you really wasn’t safe.

Paul

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Re: 23 beliefs to eliminate for natural confidence
« Reply #13 on: October 07, 2019, 06:59:29 AM »
Hi Shane,

Thanks for your message.

Yes, it would still be "I wasn't safe", as "I'm not safe/I wasn't safe" is a global belief.

If you experienced a certain trauma, "I'm not safe" is a reasonable conclusion to reach at the time. It just gets extrapolated to all/most situations. So, you might not have been safe in THAT situation, but not all situations. And if you believe, on a subconscious level, that "I'm not safe"...certain feelings will be present.

Every belief can be challenged and eliminated, really. Without knowing what the trauma was, I can discuss this in general terms.

Counterexamples:

"Maybe I wasn't safe at that time, but that doesn't mean I'd never be safe"

"Maybe I was just unfortunate and it had nothing to do with safety at all"

"Maybe what happened had nothing to do with me at all"

"Maybe I wasn't safe in that situation, but would be perfectly safe in others"

I could go on...and on.

So, no belief is ever 100% THE truth in an objective way. A belief acts as a perceptual filter, and everyone has their own set of "truths."

You can eliminate "I am not safe", "It is not safe to feel safe" and layer in suggestions that accentuate protection and discernment. I highly recommend that approach.

Please let me know how you get on, Shane. Also, feel free to reach out for clarification (if required).

Kind Regards,

Paul
Paul McCabe - PSTEC Master Practitioner
http://www.lifestyleforchange.com

Please contact me anytime if you want any assistance in utilising PSTEC to help you live a life of tremendous freedom & possibility.

Recreate yourself with PSTEC.

Skype, Zoom, in-person & phone sessions available.

Brian

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Re: 23 beliefs to eliminate for natural confidence
« Reply #14 on: October 08, 2019, 05:35:30 AM »
To add to Paul's - It's also possible to have the belief "I am never safe" in which case you will want to blast.
If you think it, feel it or say it...PSTEC it!
Book a session: https://goo.gl/2VxCUa
Tools I use: Clicktracks (Basic, EEF, 2015) Accelerators, Positive, Positive Extra, Negative, Belief Blasters, Cascade Release, No More Anxiety, No More Anger, Anger Loop, PTSD Loop, Stop Smoking, Think & Grow Rich


 



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